Newborn Sleep Deprivation Is Real: A Former Pediatric Nurse's Honest Lessons By Yvonne Gimbert

Confessions of a Former Pediatric Nurse–Turned–New Mom:

When my first was born, I thought I was prepared. I’d been a pediatric nurse for seven years. I had changed thousands of diapers, wiped countless tears, and rocked more babies to sleep than I could count. Honestly? I was probably a little too confident.

When our daughter was only a few days old, my husband was changing her diaper. He casually asked, “How long do babies wear diapers?” I rolled my eyes: “At least two years, if not more.” How did he not know this?!

A few days later, everything shifted. I became extremely sleep-deprived, waking multiple times each night to nurse. As the exhaustion settled in, it felt endless. But wait, this is what I’d wanted my entire life. I’d dreamed of becoming a mom. So why were the first weeks so hard?

As a nurse in the pediatric ICU, I survived physically and emotionally challenging shifts by telling myself, “It’s only 12 hours. I can do anything for 12 hours.” But motherhood isn’t a 12-hour shift. It’s beautiful and relentless, and I wasn’t prepared for that. I remember thinking, “I can’t keep doing this. This is never going to end.” Was something wrong with me? Was I a terrible mother?

Nothing was wrong with me, and nothing is wrong with you if you’re feeling this way. My life had changed. Change is hard. We don’t talk enough about how brutal newborn sleep deprivation can be. Instead, moms hear unhelpful (and honestly, hurtful) advice like “Sleep when the baby sleeps,” or worse, “What did you expect? You knew what you were getting into.”

Somehow, society framed sleep deprivation as a badge of motherhood. We’re told to be grateful we’re not sleeping because it means we’re blessed with a child. I’m all for gratitude, but not for shaming moms who want proper sleep. Sleep supports wellness. Children need parents who are happy and healthy. Let’s support moms, not expect martyrdom.

At four months, our pediatrician gave us the green light to sleep train. Through that process, and raising two kids, I learned a lot. If any of this brings one mom a bit of peace, I’ll be glad I shared.

5 Lessons I Learned About Baby Sleep (and Motherhood)

1) Every Child Is Different

What worked for your first may not work for your second. Babies arrive with their own personalities. One may nap anywhere; the other may crave structure and a crib-only schedule. That doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong, it means they’re human.

2) Some Days (and Nights) Are Just Hard

Even with solid routines, some days will feel brutal. Hang in there. Stay consistent. Remember: the days can feel long, but the year flies by.

3) It’s Okay to Ask for, and Accept, Help

Exhaustion is not a badge to wear. Lean on your partner, family, friends, or neighbours. And don’t just ask for help, say yes when it’s offered. If someone offers to hold the baby so you can nap, take the nap. Your future self will thank you.

4) Perfection Isn’t the Goal

Some days you’ll feel like Mary Poppins; other days you’ll feel like a hot mess (you’re not). Your kids love you fiercely on all of those days. I don’t know a single mom who isn’t trying her absolute best. Give yourself grace.

5) You Don’t Have to Love Every Part of Motherhood

I didn’t love breastfeeding. It felt awkward in public and left me touched-out. I missed having my body to myself. That didn’t make me a bad mom, it made me human. We put so much pressure on ourselves, and it only makes life harder.

Remember: you are exactly the parent your little one needs. They think you’re perfect. And while none of us are truly perfect, you are the perfect mom for your child.

Yvonne is a Certified Pediatric Sleep consultant whose gentle approach helps parents teach their babies and young children (up to age seven) to fall asleep more easily at bedtime, sleep longer stretches through the night, and nap more consistently during the day

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